The Ritual Game (Homebrew World edition)
How it works: I’ll say what magical effect I want to create. You reply with “Of course, but…” and then 1-4 of the following.
• You must draw on a place of power, such as __
• It’s going to take __ minutes/hours/day
• First you must __
• You’ll need help from __
• It’ll require the sacrifice of __
• The best you can do is __
• You/your allies will risk danger from __
When you give your answer, you must also describe a magical effect that you wish to create. Another participant will answer, tagging you and telling you what’s required, then posting the magical effect they wish to create. And so on, and so on.
Rules
When you reply, tag the person you’re replying to and copy/paste the effect they want to create.
If a ritual has already been answered, don’t answer it again (cross-posts are okay.)
No commentary posts! Just post the effect you desire, or the requirements for someone else’s effect.
(requirements above are slightly tweaked from standard Ritual, per my Homebrew World rules. Also, h/t to T. Franzke who first started one of these back in the day. EDIT: tagging the right Tim!)
I’ll go first
The rains keep falling and the dam threatens to burst. I wish to perform a ritual to save my home town from flooding.
What is required?
.
Of course, Jeremy Strandberg, but you must draw on a place of power, such as a dam.
Effect I need: It’s war, gruesome and bloody. Officers have already been to the steading that serves as our base several times, conscripting younger and younger men—and now boys—and marching them away for cursory training and then away to the front lines. But the warfront has moved closer and closer to the steading, and threatens to engulf us soon. What I want is an enchantment that will bring slumber to anyone who draws a weapon in our steading or the lands it overlooks.
Of course, John at Deep Six Delver – but it’ll require the sacrifice of every soul that’s ever drawn a blade in anger within your steading.
I require a book, bound in goatshide with a spine as thick as your thumb, to be replicated and distributed across the land dozens or hundreds of times.
Of course, Joe Banner , but it will require the sacrifice (and skin) of the most perfect kid (young goat) alive. This must be burned alongside the book until they are both naught but ashes. Then these ashes must be placed upon the bookshelves of each library you wish to house your book. In a day, a perfect copy will appear on the shelf.
My kingdom is dying; all children are stillborn- even livestock, the only water that is left turns to poison in our throats, and the doors to the kingdom are magically sealed. My people are dying, I need a ritual to undo this curse.
Of course, Mark Weis, tis the easiest thing! But first you must acquire the left hand of your kingdom’s sovereign. Then you must burn it in sacrifice (along with a grown man who is pure of heart), at the culmination of a ritual that requires 3 days and 3 nights of dancing before a roaring pyre on the peak of Dwyfol Bryn (or such other place of power).
John at Deep Six Delver, but I have a dam! I require a ritual to preserve it from the rising waters, or to otherwise save my town!
Of course, Jeremy Strandberg, but you must draw on a place of power, such as a dam. To draw on the place of power, you might use big turbines, and huge jumper cables like in Back To The Future, with each cable clamped to a crystal shard atop a separate staff in each hand, one of white oak and one of ebony.
Jeremy Strandberg, we accidentally broke the chain. Do you want to name a new ritual effect, or shall I?
All yours, John at Deep Six Delver!
Okay, I require a ritual to kill an immortal, heartless witch, the mother of Fiends, and a pretty evil cuss in her own right, who has bedeviled my campaign since Session 5, and just swallowed the Ranger alive in Session 28. I don’t want the Ranger to be harmed, and I don’t want the witch’s evil essence to seep into anything. Please help!
The problem – of course, is that the witch is heartless.
First, you must make her fall in love – a child, another witch, an item, an idea whatever. With the help of a servant Fiend (to feed her powdered crystal) and a month of two, a heart will grow in her chest.
This, however, will not kill the witch – it will just make her mortal, and trap all her evilness in her jeweled heart. You can safely remove your companion afterwards, wizard.
You know why i know this ritual? i used it to slay angels and get their power, but now…. now I want to be a good person.
Of course, Andrea Serafini, we all wish to be good people once again. And I know just the ritual for you!
Alas, you must first acquire or knap a knife of fluorite crystal with an impossibly sharp edge. Take it to a place of power, one that arose through deeds most foul, and bury it. There it must rest of 1,001 nights, attuning itself to the dark power of the place. Retrieve the knife and enlist the services of a faerie surgeon to cut away the evil deeds that mar your soul.
Be sure to find a qualified surgeon, though, for if the operation is botched, you might permanently damage your soul, leaving you with the kind of emptiness that drives mortals to crave the flesh or souls of their kin.
And be sure, too, to collect the excised bits of your soul and store them in a lead urn, sealed with blessed wax and buried in holy ground. You do not want that stuff getting loose.
Hmm… now, me? My traveling companion was just moments ago poisoned by a puff adder. Normally a trifle of a thing to address (just put a bezoar under the tongue) but I, alas, am plum out of bezoars.
Certainly a ritual exists to purge my companion of this venom before he succumbs?
Of course, Jeremy Strandberg, such a ritual can easily be performed using the venom sac of any poisonous creature. How do you use such a thing in your magic (I always have my players tell me how their magic works, and what it looks like)?
MAGIC EFFECT: After a long a bloody campaign, the BBEG has slain my beloved, retreating to his fortress. I’m done with senseless hunting. I wish to call upon the most unholy of rituals to have Death visit his door and claim his soul.
Ron Shier of course, but the best you can do is win an audience with Death and plead your case to him or her. You’ll first need to acquire something that Death desires, then sacrifice a terrifying amount of your own blood, enough that you risk dying yourself.
Hmm. I needs travel to a large city, a 5 day trek. But I have neither the time nor the inclination to trudge through dust and mud for 5 days. I desire a ritual to get me there anon.
Jeremy Strandberg Of course, but first you must secure some means of transportation; a carriage will do. You must then mark said transport with runes that will allow it to slip into the ethereal plane, and then navigate your journey that way. Certainly not a safe journey, but definitely no dust and mud.
I require knowledge of the location of the Book of the Six Sages. My conventional divination magics don’t seem to be up to the task.
That artwork is awesome
Peter J The Book of the Six Sages was written so that none save the sages themselves could access it. As such, it requires a Sage’s Hand to summon it. When you place a pen in the hand, and lay it across a blank book, the hand will begin to write. In 6 days’ time, the book will be complete. Be warned, though: if you lose the hand, the writing in the book will vanish.
A demon has wormed its way into the heart of my beloved, but it is an ancient one- modern exorcisms have no effect on it. Is there a way to remove it through the same dark magics that bound it in the first place?
Mark Weis certainly, certainly. But you’ll need help from Xanyo Thrice-Wicked, also called the Voice of Seven Poisons, also called the First Sorcerer. He is said to know the names of all the demons in the pit and the words to draw each one forth.
Oh, and I suppose, of course, that you will risk the death of your beloved. Or at least her sanity. And the damnation of your immortal soul.
Me, though? I require but a little thing: a magical blade that leaves wounds that never fully heal. I know full well how to craft a blade that kills with every strike, but my current project requires something more… subtle.
To forge a sword that never fully heal, you’ll need to go in the empty place between the words, and forge it there.
Of course, that lack of essence in the words can cause… fissures when you use it, but it seems quite… nothing to pay, don’t you think?
Something easy, now. I discovered that going out of my tower to buy food, or sending my imps to do so – exposes me to the risk of poisoning. So, anyone knows how i can stop the need of eating, or how i can create infinite, delicious food of my own?
Andrea Serafini
Find a precious stone: a ruby works best. Have it cut in the rough shape of an heart: then have your most beloved tortured and killed. Have a necromancer take out her earth and place the ruby in the cavity her heart was in. Wait for three days: on the fourth day, swallow the ruby, and kill yourself. The love and the hatred of your most beloved will save you, turning you into an undead.
You are now free from hunger.
I wonder: for how long will the nightmares of your guilty action follow you after the dirty deed is done?
In the meantime, I am looking for a ritual to cast a thunderous storm against the ships of the army of the Church of The Divine Anor, coming for my head, the head of a poor necromancer serving the King of the Deep.