Proofreading needed

Proofreading needed

Proofreading needed

I am wrapping up a smaller L&B project that needs proofreading. Whoever chips in will get a copy of this 40+ page pdf for free. That’s a $4 or $5 value for several hours of your time! Plus proofreading credit if I can figure out a way to cram it onto the credits page (I just realized I need to do that).

I would like to get proofing notes back by next Friday, September 23.

First 3 people to respond are in!

17 thoughts on “Proofreading needed”

  1. I’m at the end of the list, but happy to help and would not ask for anything free in return. I have a degree in English and I know the material in context.

  2. Marshall Miller, proofreading is underway and I will drop questions for you here. First ones:

    1) Black Oak Ridge: the urisk in Black Oak Ridge is listed as doing 6 damage. Is that intentional? Should it be 1d6?

    2) The Goblin Hole: talking bird skull appears to use Apocalypse World style bonds. I rewrote the moves, let me know if they work for you:

    When you witness an NPC being heckled by a talking bird skull, take +1 forward to Parley with them.

    When you roll a 6- in the presence of the skull, you gain the bond, “The talking bird skull knows the extent of my failure and won’t let me forget it.”

    3) The Goblin Hole: orkaster is listed as doing 13 damage. Intentional?

    Thank you!

  3. 1. 1d6

    2. Those are good changes.

    3. I believe the goblin and goblin orkaster were lifted directly from the pre-gamma dungeon world rules, back when everything had fixed damage amounts. We should probably use the current monster listing for canon creatures.

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