7 thoughts on “I’ve made a thing…”

  1. Sure.

    Things I Like:

    It’s a fun and respectful take on the houngan archetype in a fantasy setting, incorporating a lot of elements like the mojo and burying fetishes, without dipping into the hokey stereotype stuff like voodoo dolls. A particularly like that the core moves are about influence, healing, and protection, with a little trickery.

    It’s a useful class, lots they can do but they aren’t flashy. I like how most of the magical effects are subtle magic. Provides a nice alternative to the classic D&D style wizard or cleric.

    Mojo is just great. The effects are versatile, but limited enough to make you get creative to get the most out of them. The flavor of the move is totally spot-on. (On my initial read, I found myself asking “but what do you have to do in fiction to spend your Mojo?” But then I realized that’s a classic “ask the player” bit.)

    The fact that Voodoo Ritual always requires a blood sacrifice… that’s nice. It’s not like it adds a significant requirement, but it makes it clear that this kind of magic is bloody and primal.

    Really like most of the fetish moves.

    Hoodoo Feast is fantastic flavor.

    Suggestions & Critiques

    One big thing that seems to be missing to me is the idea of being “ridden” by the spirits. You’ve got One With Spirit, but what about something like the Druid’s Communion of Whispers, but you actually invite the spirit’s in rather than just talk to them? And on a 7-9, instead of vague answers you get consequences related to the spirit’s controlling you for a while.

    Big Eye Fetish and Jittering Fetish overlap a lot in their utility. They both are about warding an area and warning you if something approaches. I definitely see the differences, but I’d pretty much never take Big Eye over Jittering. I’d drop Big Eye and replace it with something else.

    Bad Voodoo: Why does the curse only last until the next sunrise? The limitation of “only one at a time” gives you reason not to just leave a curse going.

    Big Bad Voodoo: Unless I’m missing something, you could rephrase it much more elegantly as “When you use Bad Voodoo, choose 1 extra option. Even on a miss, you choose 1 (in addition to whatever the GM says).” Gives you room for another whole move if you want.

    Root Fortitude is a neat concept but pretty limited in utility. Defy Danger with CON rolls aren’t super common, and tracking/remembering that at some point you used some bandages that the witch doctor made and now it’s time Defy Danger with CON… that’s kind of a pain. Plus, a +1 bonus to a move that doesn’t get triggered super often is pretty weak sauce. Any given +1 bonus only makes a difference about 1 in 4 rolls.

    I’d consider changing it something where someone like “when someone uses one of the items you made with Rootworker, they gain Fortitude if they don’t already have it. They can expend their Fortitude to skip a +CON roll and treat the result as a 10+.”

    Zombi Powder: it reads a little funny to me. Seems like there are two parts… crafting the powder and then applying it. Maybe you treat it like a poison instead? Also, does it have any passive effect? Or are they just acting normal and then you’re like “dude c’mere” and they do? Seems like zombi powder should put them in a trance, and they follow you around passively until they’re your hold is gone.

    Someone Call For the Doctor is a little weak on a 7-9, given the time requirements to invoke it. Also, maybe you could make it more interesting? Like, maybe it can heal damage OR neutralize a poison OR cure an infection (choose 1). And instead of a -1 forward on a 7-9, you could do something related to the spirits? Like, maybe they attract a malicious spirit, or you need to promise to do something for a spirit first, etc.

    Voodoo Ritual: could be even better if you changed up the possible requirements to be more tied to the rest of the flavor. Options like “You’ll need to sacrifice _” or “You’ll need to call up a spirit of _ to help” or something like that. Heck, maybe you rework it entirely to have the blood sacrifice summon a spirit or spirits that you name, and then you tell them what you want, and they tell you what they require to make it so.

  2. Jeremy Strandberg Thanks a lot for your criticism. I found myself agreeing with most of your suggestions and i’ve taken the bold move of adding them and also adding your name to the credit list (if that is alright with you).

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